The dudes in white shirts and black berets, who are supposed to be vehicle inspection officers will lurk in corners, camouflaged by bushy hedges and wait for you to make that ill fated turn into a one way street.
Your pleas and even well mannered attempts at apology and drawing attention to an absence of warning signs will fall on deaf ears. There is no excuse for flouting the Law.
You may then intend to exercise your right to not be bullied into submission but they have that angle covered as well. That's when the good guy among the lot will offer to assist you by convincing you to move your car to a more suitable location while he offers you alternatives to the heavy fine you're to pay.
Did I mention that he's found a way into your car already?
Left with the lesser evil, you negotiate your car's freedom. But by the time your agreement is made you're at the impound station.
It's Friday and you have just the two thousand naira for fuel. You've been offered a let off fee of N15,000 from the initial N25,000.
You begin to wail, your sense of decorum is lost and you may lose your car until Tuesday.
For each day your car's impounded, there's an extra fee to be paid.
Wetin you wan do?
Anoda wan...
There's a notice on your residence claiming non remittance of a Land Use Charge for 3 years. You're the last to know about this and you have a week to sort it out or the State Government takes over your property wey you just inherit.
Hian!
You go to the office to make appropriate enquiries on payment procedures. You're told you'll pay big money... But she could help you. You're asked to return the next day.
Upon your return, you find that the charges are standard, no adjustments made but if you had shown "stubbornness"
dem for show you.
Your money is still big given the interest accumulated but you're expected to "settle" them for the inconvenience.
Wetin you wan do?
Anoda anoda wan...
Phcn staff come ya house come read metre and give you new bill. You discover that you've been charged far more than usual. The guy explains to you in the most unconvincing manner that your metre runs too fast.
Hian.
I'm hardly home. Most appliances are turned off except for the mini fridge... and how come that much consumption since the last reading and payment?
Your phcn guy says it's your metre's fault, that infact based on its reading, you should be paying twice as much!
What's the solution?
Eh, pay the current bill and keep something in an envelope for metre adjustment.
You took phcn guy's phone number and promised to be in touch.
However his parting shot was that
that na between two of una o,eh,as he's trying to help.
Wetin you Wan do na?
No be you I dey ask?
A deep passion for the radio broadcast profession has
compelled me to put a few thoughts together on the best way to go about Radio
Presentation or to highlight the true qualities of today’s On-Air-Personality.
